New Facebook App to Keep you Alive Online After you Die
Jen Whiteman, a spokesperson from Facebook explains the rationale behind the new application.
‘We are the first generation who will have to face how to deal with both physical and potential online death. People are increasingly reliant on having a regular online presence and the thought of that presence being abruptly ended is quite upsetting for some people. Physical death can be quite an inconvenience to keeping your status up to date or posting comments, so we have created a new app, especially for this demographic called the ‘I’m dead lol! app’ which will ensure the online presence doesn’t have to stop just because the heartbeat does.
This is not only important for the deceased user to maintain their online presence but also for the benefit of all their Facebook friends. It is such a bummer going onto a Facebook friend’s home page to find them inactive because they have died. This will be a growing problem as the Facebook generation ages.
The app works by learning about your Facebook behavior when alive, what you comment on most, and the type of comments. These will then be mimicked after death by the artificially intelligent application. When it comes to posting pics, old pics will be recycled of nice places you have been to, to which we will add appropriately boastful and at the same time self-mocking comments like; ‘Look at me in our hired villa in the south of France, don’t I look gorgeous? You wouldn’t want to see me now #deathnotgoodforcomplexionlol!.’
We will also send personal messages from the deceased to ex-family members and partners to keep the deceased in their thoughts such as…‘ I can see what you are doing you know, and its disgusting!’.
The ‘I’m dead lol app’ starts at just US$29.99 per year, for an additional US$9.99 supplement a live chat feature can be enabled, with artificially intelligent responses which accurately mirror the responses the deceased would have given if alive.
So for many people what this app will effectively do is maintain a very similar level and type of communication after death with most of their Facebook friends that they had when they were alive. For some it might even improve communication.’